Free Shit

Am I the only one not getting everything for free? I feel like everyone's getting free t-shirts, free tickets, free this and that - and then they're gloating about. Hey everyone, if you got something for free, I don't wanna hear about it over and over again. You're not special because you won a t-shirt. With quiet dignity, let me know about it. And then, I think, I'll be able to rejoice in your good fortune. But don't slap me in the face with it.