Special Request

This post goes out to all of you who don't know too much music before 1990! Enjoy!

1) The Band, 1960s-late 70s -- No library is complete without two albums, "Music at Big Pink" and "The Band". This music is like medicine. You can take it any time to make you feel better. Or, if you're not interested in feeling better, some of these will bring you down - but in that good way, where other guys are down with you. The perfect bar band; three of rock n roll's best singers; the tightest shit there is. Feel the wood. Also: "Rock of Ages," "Music from the Last Waltz" (see the concert film by Marty Scorsese. Simply one of the best movies of all time in any genre.)

2) Elvis Costello -- Simply put, he's my boy. The man is one of the most gifted pop songwriters of all time. I'd say just make your way through his catalogue, album by album, from "My Aim Is True" - classics on this record! Feels like music at a 50s dance with the intensity, wit, and snarl that characterizes so much new wave music - to "Imperial Bedroom," a quirky masterpiece produced by Beatles' engineer Geoff Emerick. Everything in between is excellent, with tracks that hit you right in the heart. The Attractions are the best rock n roll backing band ever, bass, keys, and drums. EC is a must.

3) "Tusk" - Fleetwood Mac. Man, my dick just got hard. This sprawling two-disc set (now available as one CD due to cutting off half of track "Sara") is as beautiful as it is quirky. Lindsey Buckingham, lead songwriter, producer, guitarist and general mastermind of the band presents song after song of goodness. The two ladies, Nicks and McVie, have some gorgeous songs, but its the 9 Buckingham tracks that can be listened to over and over. He has a certain sensibility here that is like no other -- the man's got a screw loose, but boy, these are great love songs. One of my favorite albums.

4) Randy Newman - Anything by this man will impress, melodically and lyrically. He has his own unique sound, and his lyrics are clever, funny and true. I prefer "12 Songs" and "Good Old Boys," both full of pop gems. A true heir to Dylan. (Also scores a sick soundtrack, i.e., "The Natural" starring Robert Redford.)

5) "New York" by Lou Reed. The man's insane, crude, dumb, and smart. The man makes one of a kind shit. This album is beautiful in its ugliness. Better than "Transformer". You feel the city streets. Great guitar and lyrics as always. "Romeo Had Juliette" - classic album opener.

AND: Any Nick Cave and Tom Waits.

"Death Rattle"

FACIAL HAIR

There are people out there who shouldn't have beards. Either you can grow one or not. Don't try and be someone who looks silly with a beard because man you just look silly.

I am an on and off beard guy. I always doubt what I should do. I think a beard looks good on me, but then I think, Hey, maybe I should be clean shaven. That's when I wear a mustache for 2 weeks.

With mustaches, YES. Grow it. That's a liberating experience -- and it's dying in this country! Mustaches should be treated with respect, not fear, or, worse, hostility. Enjoy. Grow the 'stache. They're actually easier to pull off than beards, except that beards have gotten some undue street rep these days cuz they're the progeny of indie rock dick suckers spending time in isolated shacks in the woods who don't even think of transcendentalism.

Beard: if you can, please.

Mustache: everyone deserves one.

One love.

-Dan

JUST DESSERTS

Mmmmmm, how does it taste?

Agenda: MUSIC/District 9

Just gonna go through a few quick songs that really kick my ass.

"Blind" -Tom Waits, Rain Dogs. Let's start strong, eh?: "the only kind of love is stoned blind love." Yes. Your right, Tom. This is song lives in the heart.

........oh, fuck I'm just gonna say Rain Dogs. The whole thing. Few albums compare to it because Tom Waits has a style that cannot be duplicated and the man always stays true to his vision. He is uncompromising. Rain Dogs is a work out of art in the sense of a sculpture or a painting. You hear the whole damned thing in every track as if it were a painting on display. A truer album has never been made.

Plus it's listenable. Subtle, at times grating, but always listenable. MELODY. Music is music because of a melody -- Metal Machine Music has melody therefore it is music.

The songwriting is perfect. It's just so. It fits. It simply exists. Rain Dogs is why people love music but more importantly this kind of album makes other people want to create music. Inspiring.

Other albums Fucking Good Like This (FGLT): Astral Weeks, Van Morrison; Dude Ranch, Blink 182; A Tribute to Jack Johnson, Miles Davis.

AND

District 9 -- Loved it. My heart was racing the entire time. The movie is not a metaphor. It is, of course, but it isn't as well.

D9 is a success because of Sharlto "the Future of Acting" Copley. He gives the movie heart and soul and humor. He rocks it. Go to see this man give a brilliant, NATURAL performance.

This is the kind of movie that needs to be made. One made with heart, care, and skill. Man was my heart pounding. Not as good as The Hurt Locker (how could it be?) but still pretty damned good. See District 9.

DONE.

the infinite mass of human emotion

JACKSON POLLOCK

AN OKAY TIME

ANIMAL COLLECTIVE AT PROSPECT PARK, BROOKLYN

(the obligatory fruity picture of the three amigos - who looks lamest?)

I have long enjoyed Animal Collective; lately I had been enjoying them more than ever. So I was looking forward to seeing them at Prospect Park in Brooklyn, yesterday, Saturday, Aug. 15.

I was disappointed. To be fair, Animal Collective put on a decent show. But that's it. Decent. Mediocre. Here's why:

1) The ambient interludes. Too long and too fucking boring. The time spent noodling - that is, fiddling with knobs at their cute little stations - was painfully long. It seemed like it was impossible for any momentum to gather during the course of the entire show. A song would kick ass then crumble (In the Flowers).

2) This is similar to the point above - maybe a sister complaint to point 1, 1.B if you will - but AC has some great moments in their songs that are lost amid all of the bullshit. When a song finally kicks into overdrive it's too little too late. Or it's totally fucking awesome but they break the flow, going into an interlude in the middle of a song (Fireworks - a boss song that felt weak, mostly cuz they noodled through most of it).

3) NO STAGE PRESENCE. I understand that this is how Animal Collective makes music. BEHIND THEIR MUSIC MODULES! I don't give a shit. There's barely any attempt to engage the audience. Cool set design but that's about it. The band seem lame, suffering from a too cool for school indie rock disease that makes them feel like they don't have to put on a show for the audience. I bet there was a time when people didn't care about their music so AC was forced to ENTERTAIN. Now they've been branded as the second coming of god knows what, so they can do whatever they want. Avey Tare sucks. LAME LAME LAME dude. Panda Bear makes great music and seems OK. Geologist's head never stopped moving the entire time. He has a beard.

4) No "Who Could Win a Rabbit". This is a personal gripe. I love the song; best song AC has ever made. And they played it the previous night but didn't play it at the show I went to. Bummer. (But they probably would have fucked it up).

5) The Crowd. Weird crew assembled for this one. A lot of young dipshits. Some older people hobbling around. And a shit ton of couples holding each other the entire time. Maybe that's what this kind of show is suited for: Lovers who think music is OK.

Alrite, enough, you get the idea. Not great. Though, to be fair, maybe I'm being a little tough on the little guys. A lot of people will have definitely loved the show. They're the new jam band. They're a jam band. I've never been really into the whole jam band long show jamming thing, so it's logical I didn't like this.

Anyways, I still love AC's albums - great shit. So "tHe fIv3" ANIMAL COLLECTIVE albums (as of right now):

1) Strawberry Jam

2) Sung Tongs

3) Feels

4) Merriwether Post Pavillion

5) Water Curses EP

Stick to vinyl, gentlemen.

ANCIENT TIMES

BEER

Guinness, Budweiser, Coors (Banquet), Estrella Damm, Foster's, PBR, Shaeffer, Hoegaarden, Stella Artois, Sierra Nevada, Keystone, Busch, STEEL RESERVE, Haufner Brau, Heineken, Natty, #9, Brooklyn Blast, Hoptycal Illustion, John Smith's Extra Smooth, Boddington's, Corona, the Champagne of Beers, Beast, Blue Moon (eh), Honey Brown, Miller Light (only at Chuck's), Modelo, these come to mind

STRENGTH

Strength. Not physical strength, but mental toughness. Emotional toughness. Being strong when others are not. This is what makes a person great.

But these people are not always rewarded. It is easier to be weak. Strength oftentimes seems to benefit every one but the strong.

Is there any other way to be? Yes. Of course. Then again, depending on the person, there is no other way. Temptation - the easy way out, the way that puts the burden elsewhere - will be present at every turn your life takes. You can't take it.

It's tough. No one is perfect. But strength is what makes a man.

And when it gets hard to be strong, you know what? Just have a beer and see how you feel.

A Person Who Is Unreliable

1) Doesn't pick up the phone. Pick up your fucking phone. Respond to a text. JOIN THE REST OF THE WORLD.

2) Needs too much time. Do things with a little speed and intensity -- would it kill you to move at a rate faster than a glacial pace?

3) USE YOUR WORDS. Communication is key. Life is based on communication with other HUMAN BEINGS. Listen, interpret, formulate, respond.

4) Blank stares. C'mon! Eye contact! Show some fucking intersest!

5) Call me a fag if I deserve it! Where's your fire?

6) Losing attitude. Glass half empty. Glass fucking shattered and the remains have entered the sole of your foot = bad attitude.

7) INTERESTS. It's important to have interests. Hobbies. Keep occupied with something, anything.

8) LOVE & APPRECIATE YOURSELF

9) LOVE & APPRECIATE OTHERS

10) Understand that there are highs and lows, for you and other people. Act accordingly but understand that you may need to put on A BRAVE FACE.

WORLD LEADERS - SHIRTLESS!

There's something comforting in seeing a world leader shirtless. It reminds you that these are real people. I think that world leaders should be topless more often. In fact, there should've been a topless summit instead of a beer summit (or a combination of them both. Especially if former Ukranian Prime Minister Yuliya Volodymyrvina Tymshenko was involved. Hubba Hubba.) So here are some world leaders, or former world leaders, topless.

Russian President Vladimir Putin jogging with a rifle in Siberia. Doesn't this just scream "badass"?

Obama looking as supple as a young Penny Hardaway with a hint of Denzel and the edge of Chris Brown. Work it!

And let's end with some class: the late Ronald Reagan looking good even in old age, along with his beautiful bride, Nancy.

NO DEACHUNTER AT THE BROOKLYN BOWL

NO DEACHUNTER

Brendan Dunn leads an interpretive dance at the Brooklyn Bowl during Dan Deacon's set of the round robin super jam NO DEACUNTER feautring Deerhunter and No Age along with Deacon. I am in a ponytail laughing hysterically at what might have been one of the funniest things I have ever seen.

GO HERE TO WATCH: THE MAN IN THE MUSTARD SHIRT

It was truly a great show and a great experience. Highlights, notable moments, presented chronologically:

1) VINNIE'S PIZZA! Great little pizza joint, serving quirky pizza slices. First time there, damned good. Dunn got the Mac Attack (mac and cheese and bacon on a slice) and I got a nachos supreme slice. Funny decour and the dude behind the counter was a great guy.

2) SHOW RAINED OUT -- Lame. Sad in front of the gate.

3) OH, REALLY? Amidst hasidic jews we over hear the show has been moved to the

4) Brooklyn Bowl

5) LONG LINE -- Dunn tells a 19 year old to shave the pubes off of his face, talk Blink 182 with some dudes, gin, Banquet beers, cut the line when I meet some Syracuse people up in front.

6) MORE WAITING -- briefly meet Bradford Cox of Deerhunter -- maadd skinny. Nice enough guy.

7) IN. Get some beer (Brooklyn Lager BLAST) meet a guy from Berlin who tells us he's playing Bethpage Black this week. NICE.

8) Meet Dan Deacon.

GRG: Hey, Dunn, that's Dan Deacon.

DUNN: DANNY!

DAN: Hey.

GRG: Yo, Dan, I heard that Lee "Scratch" Perry is sitting in with you guys tonight.

DAN: False. Where'd you hear that? False.

GRG: I just made it up. But you should play "People Funny Boy".

DAN: You should play soccer.

9) Meet Avey Tare of Animal Collective. The dude is wearing a bucket hat with a murse holding himself and it looks like I am scaring him. I tell him I don't wanna be offputting, I just wanna say hello, that I enjoy his music. I ask him if he's sitting in with the bands tonight. He chuckles and says, No, and I tell him that he's modest -- it's good that he didn't want to steal their thunder. During this time Dunn calls him Payne Stewart and "Eva Negre".

10) Discussion with Dunn, based on our meetings with Deacon and Tare, of how the indie rock scene is full of straight pusses who don't know what rock and roll is. Dunn wants more 80s hair band partying.

10.5) Dean, drummer from No Age, comes over after we continually yell "YEAH!" at him. He comes over. A little more of bro but after he leaves the discussion continues.

11) CONCERT BEGINS. LOUD LOUD LOUD. Awesome jam at the beginning, so much sound. No Age rocks hardest, Deacon tad gay, Deerhunter damned solid. Dunn does his thing. Moshing. Excellent show.

12) Bradford Cox tell us all "To do the right thing" and leave so other people can get in for the second show, advising us to do a bunch of things -- including sex -- but then he thinks better of it and tells everyone not to have sex. See note 10.

13) New York, New York exit music. Best song of the night? Singing in the bathroom.

14) Bum stogs outside as many people approach Dunn and call him Mustard shirt man. Funny. A girl on the subway asks him to sign her copy of Spin magazine.

15) Reflection

Great time, a lot of fun. Can't wait for more shows. The change to the Brooklyn Bowl improved the show though there was some bullshit along the way.

FUCK SHARKS

I sure as hell don't care that it's fucking shark week. Everyone should stop tweeting about it -- don't fucking tell me your watching shark week cuz it's not that entertaining to watch in general (it's OK) and certainly not interesting to hear about (lame). Dumb.